Perfect children do not always know how to smile, nor do they know the sound of happiness: they fear making mistakes and never reaching the high expectations of their parents. Their education is not based on freedom or recognition but on the authority of a rigid and demanding voice.
The possible consequences:
- Dependence and passivity: a child accustomed to being sent stops deciding for himself. Therefore, he always seeks external approval and loses his spontaneity and personal freedom.
- Lack of emotion: perfect children inhibit their emotions to adjust to what “must be done” and all this emotional repression has serious consequences in the short and long term.
- Low self-esteem: a child or adolescent accustomed to external demands has no autonomy or capacity to make decisions. All this creates a very negative self-esteem.
- Frustration, resentment and internal discomfort can translate very well in times of aggression.
- Anxiety is another characteristic factor of these children: any change or new situation creates personal insecurity and high anxiety.
The need to educate “perfect children” is a subtle and direct way of giving the world unhappy children. The pressure of demand will always accompany them and even more so if their education is based on the absence of positive stimuli and affection.
It is clear that as parents we want our children to succeed but above all is their happiness. Nobody wants their teenagers to develop depression or be so demanding of themselves that they don’t know what it is to allow themselves to enjoy, smile or make mistakes.